Okay so hopefully you'll never need to know how to cancel your wedding. And even calling this an 'FAQ' is a litte disinegenous as in reality we don't get many couples asking us about cancelling their weddings. But life is life, and if the unthinkable happens, for whatever reason - whether it's a break-up, a global pandemic, an illness or a bereavement - and you have to call things off, we want you to have a go-to checklist for cancelling or postponing your wedding.

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1. Decide Whether it's Postpone or Cancel

Before you start making calls or emailing your guests, it's important to decide if you're postponing your wedding, or cancelling it completely. If it's a postponement, your wedding venue should be your first port of call. If you have a new date, that will dictate how you proceed from there. Alternatively, you may be able to request they hold your deposit until you're in a better position to set a new date.

2. Check the Cancellation Policy in your Contracts

Each supplier may have a slightly different cancellation policy so it's important to look through your contracts to see where you stand and how to proceed. Generally deposits are non-refundable, but there may be room for flexibility - there's more detail on cancellations and deposits below. If you need to cancel a honeymoon too, check your travel insurance before contacting your travel agent, hotels or airline.

3. Hand it Over to a Friend

Of course the circumstances will differ from couple to couple, but in the case of break-up, bereavement or illness, you may not be in a position to deal with the admin of cancelling a wedding yourself. Find a responsible, 'on it' friend or family member- this could even be your trusted bridesmaid or best man - and ask them to get in touch with your suppliers and guests for you.

Give them a list of everyone they need to contact - it's in cases like this that being super-organised in your wedding planning pays off. A spreadsheet of guests' names and contact info is helpful, as is a dedicated wedding email account with all the correspondence in one place.

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4. Tell All Your Suppliers

Make sure you inform ALL your suppliers that you're cancelling your wedding. Some suppliers outline that a cancellation needs to be made in writing, in which case, a call and a follow-up email is a good idea.

5. Inform Your Guests

Finally, be sure to tell all your guests, prioritising those who are planning to travel. If it's very close to the wedding, some follow-up phone calls might be required to ensure everyone got the message, but generally a text or email will suffice. If you haven't sent out your invitations, wedding website link or a save the date yet, you only need to inform your bridal party or close friends and relatives, but you don't need to spread the word in any formal way. Don't feel the need to explain or go into detail about why the wedding has been cancelled if you don't want to. If you've received wedding gifts already, in the case of a break-up, it's generally polite to return them.

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6. Getting your money back - Will this happen?

While it really comes down to individual contracts most wedding suppliers will try to be as accommodating as possible for a couple cancelling their wedding. But how they can help tends to come down to two things, the circumstances and the timing.

This is why, if you've decided to cancel your wedding, it's important to get things moving as quickly as possible. Some contracts have a clause that increases the "penalty" for cancellation the closer it is to the wedding date, so you may have to pay in full if the cancellation is say, under six weeks. Which is where the circumstances come in.

In the case of an 'Act of God' like our Storm Emma/Beast from the East snowpocalypse, most suppliers will try to find new date that works or give you a refund. Some have an 'Act of God' clause in their contracts that means no payment is required in the case of a fire, flooding or extreme weather. If it's a bereavement or an illness, suppliers will generally be as understanding as possible, though you still won't be guaranteed a refund.

If you're cancelling the wedding because of a break-up or because you've changed your mind, suppliers may not be as accommodating.

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7. And What about our Deposit?

It's important to keep in mind that the reason vendors require deposits to hold a date is to protect them, but it also protects you as the client if they have to cancel.

Your booking also prevents them taking on other work for the same day. So as tough as any of these circumstances are for you - and most suppliers will be as helpful as possible - they're not obliged to refund your deposit/booking fee or final payment, unless it's stipulated in the terms of the contract.

Some may hold your deposit, then refund you if they end up getting another booking for your date

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One final word of advice is you do not need to over-explain or justify your decision in any of your communication when cancelling or postponing. Stating simply that the wedding is canceled without sharing private personal reasons is the most dignified way of doing this, and gives you and your guests due grace and consideration. Lastly you've got this. Good luck!

We've loads more FAQs on the site, as well as a list of every question you could possibly have about wedding planning, answered here